Jessica Gross

Overheard at the Gym

In people watching on October 10, 2008 at 5:13 pm

Awkward story.

Time: morning. Location: gym weights room. I’m doing crunches in the corner, spying on an academic-looking guy working with his muscular, attractive trainer.

The guy, Books, started working out before the trainer, Buff, arrived. This was a big problem.

Buff: It’s like you’re mad at me. You’re acting all pissy.

Books: No! I’m not. I’m not mad at you.

Books does strange exercise for some minutes.

Buff: Okay, have you done planks?

Books: Oh, I was just going to do another set of these. Or planks? Should I do planks first?

Buff: Um, I don’t know. I don’t know what you’ve done already. That’s why I hate when clients start working out before I get here. It really pisses me off.

I sensed the theme of being “pissed.” I also sensed some discomfort: mine. I was all up in this tiff’s grill with my crunches. Should I leave? But it was also funny! I stayed.

As the awkward tete-a-tete continued, I realized the trainee was probably more uncomfortable than me. I imagined his brain’s monologue:

“This is awkward. This is really awkward. Please make it stop….Okay it’s not stopping. Should I switch to another trainer? This guy has used ‘pissed’ twice in four sentences. It’s going to be awkward forever. But I can’t back out now — he’ll know it was because of this conversation. Oh, man. Man oh man. What’s Books to do?”

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  1. That’s ridiculous, first off…Books is PAYING the dude to train him, so your boy Books can do whatever he wants! And you really can’t do too many planks. What’s gonna happen, abs are going to develop too quickly?

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