Jessica Gross

The Brilliance of Alien Children

In musings on October 1, 2008 at 4:16 pm

Foreign kids impress me.

If a child walking with her mother declares, “Mommy! Ice cream is cold!” I shake my head and think how smart I am by comparison. (“Do you know what Fahrenheit means? How about Kelvins? Got ya, sucker!”). But if a beret-clad French child turns to her mother and says “blahblahblah, Mere!” I gasp in wonder. The words I don’t understand! The guttural rs! She must know about Kelvins and can probably name water’s freezing point.

If the kid speaks Mandarin, forget it. The less I know of the language, the smarter she must be. Never mind that she may not speak English, the Hardest and Best Language On Earth.

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  1. What about dogs that respond to commands in foreign languages? They’re the smartest type of dogs.

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