Jessica Gross

The Brilliance of Alien Children

In musings on October 1, 2008 at 4:16 pm

Foreign kids impress me.

If a child walking with her mother declares, “Mommy! Ice cream is cold!” I shake my head and think how smart I am by comparison. (“Do you know what Fahrenheit means? How about Kelvins? Got ya, sucker!”). But if a beret-clad French child turns to her mother and says “blahblahblah, Mere!” I gasp in wonder. The words I don’t understand! The guttural rs! She must know about Kelvins and can probably name water’s freezing point.

If the kid speaks Mandarin, forget it. The less I know of the language, the smarter she must be. Never mind that she may not speak English, the Hardest and Best Language On Earth.

  1. What about dogs that respond to commands in foreign languages? They’re the smartest type of dogs.

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